“You know, if you were to take away my wife and daughter, I don’t think I know who I am”
A dear friend and I were enjoying some open and raw thoughts; the words came pouring out unbidden. We didn’t get into it much more than that as some distraction or other took our attention off the subject. It was only later as I spoke to my wife that the gravity of my words hit me and shook me to the very core.
In a nutshell, it would seem my identity and self-esteem are heavily invested in other peoples opinion of me. What they think of me is key and I will usually do everything in my power to maintain a good opinion of others. This is usually manifested in keeping the peace, always deferring to other peoples beliefs and principles, avoiding confrontation and such other things.
The challenge is that in the absence of these key people, I can’t readily tell you who I am. I mean I can tell you what you want to hear or what is expected of me. But I can’t really tell you who I am.
And that scares me. A lot!
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